strangers in the night

I haven’t shared a bed with my husband since before the baby was born. So that would be 10 nights without the warmth of my partner in crime…it’s kind of weird, this haze we live in right now. I mean, I see him when he gets home from work (yesterday was his first day back) and I see him in the morning (he’s so not a morning person) but aside from that, I don’t really get to spend much quality time with him. I don’t think I factored this into my whole vision of what being a mother would entail. Heck, I don’t think I thought a whole lot about what being a mother would entail. Most of this has just come to me on the fly, but how to make sure that my husband is happy and our relationship is healthy is something I’m just not sure of. Next week I believe we will try to transition Alva from the bassinette and sleeping on top of me on the couch to his crib and me resting in the bed, with my husband. Right now something just doesn’t feel complete in my life. Not in an overwhelming emotional way, but in a kind of Shel Silverstein/Missing Piece kind of way. I’d like to reconnect with him before I let this emotion get the best of me. I know that being all things to everyone is a bit of an impossible task right now, but the simple act of sleeping next to my husband for at least 3 hours would go a long way toward helping me feel less like a stranger to the man I married.

 

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