where the past coexists with the present

It used to be that once you lost touch with people, that was it. Losing their phone number or address more or less meant that you’d spend the rest of your days searching through phone books on business trips to this city or that city, hoping that you might chance upon their information somewhere down the line…Gone are the days when one’s past simply stayed there. Now, through the magic (if you want to call it that) of social networking sites like Facebook, LinkedIn, MySpace and the like you can reconnect with all sorts of folks you honestly never thought would play a role in your life ever again. You can feel 18 again or 21 or 12 as you recall with fondness through rose colored lenses how things used to be. How you used to be. What develops is rather fascinating. . .virtual friendships with people you once had tangible relationships with. Your past comes back to life in a very interesting way. I’m in the midst of trying to figure how best to fit the past in with my present…to have the two coexist peacefully, rationally, realistically…

 

It is a random selection from eras of my past, the people I’m coming back into contact with…from chapters of my life that I thought were very finished, very finalized, very long gone. Nothing too insane or shady or character defaming. . .just interesting parts of who I was, 10 years ago. Interesting people who had a hand in shaping who I became, as I feel every person I have any significant contact with does. The issue really is, for me, how to intersect the past with the present. How do we know that unfinished business is always going to be just that, unfinished? While we’ve all matured, aged, lost hair, put on a few pounds…aren’t we all still crazy kids inside, longing to throw caution to the wind? With all of the responsibilities we now have, can we be irresponsible without consequences? Nothing immoral, no crimes committed…just let loose a little and tap into the pure joy that lives inside each of us? 

This is what dipping my toes back into the clear, glassy waters of my past is doing to my brain…scrambling it, leaving it in such a state where the past is present. Here. Now. Yet existing in such a fashion that is almost surreal. Able to be turned on and off with the selection of the away message, the red dot, the green dot, the pop up window that lets you know someone’s talking to you. All of this can bring emotional skeletons back out of the closet. It can make you feel young and exciting and relevant again…

We all came from somewhere. We all have stories, some which are more interesting than others, some which have no need to be told again…we all have a past, a history…and there’s no reason not to embrace that…no reason not to welcome those folks back into your life with open arms, chat it up with them, relive old memories…take from it what you will and apply it to your present life, your current chapter. Use the renewed sense of self you get from remembering where you came from and love more, live more…

These strolls down memory lane that I’ve been able to take in recent days have me feeling more alive than I have in quite some time. Like I said earlier, relevant…more au courant. Feeling more like and individual and less like a sheep. Feeling more like someone who has interesting things to talk about and less like a mindless automaton who just works, eats and sleeps…It’s all very healthy, very normal, very now (and apparently very hard for me to fully verbalize because as I read back over this I see that I just said the same thing over and over again…don’t blame me, I’m trapped inside my 19 year old self’s mind.)

 

 

 

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4 thoughts on “where the past coexists with the present

  1. @bergeresque
    Interesting how people from a certain point in your life can make you feel like you’re there again…like not a day has passed.

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